Replacing Memories

People have asked me how to get over feelings. How to forget past hurts and move on.

The first thing I tell them is one never tries to forget. It’s a fact that the more you try to forget about something, the more it’ll persist. 

So how do you get over it? 

Acceptance is the answer. Accept that things happened. Accept that you were hurt. Accept that the person took advantage of you. Accept that you have been stupid. This is the first step to healing yourself. 

Let yourself cry those tears. Let yourself loose in your emotion. If you’re not comfortable with it, do it at least once, in a place you’re most comfortable in. Perhaps a bedroom, a favorite place, a friend’s house. Wherever it is, make sure you’re okay crying your heart out. 

Let yourself remember. There’s no use in denying the past existed. You’ll only be deceiving yourself. 

Once you have achieved this. The next step is to replace those memories. So you and this special guy once dated in that mall, and after the relationship soured up, you try to avoid it like the plague. DON’T. If you have a new guy, bring him there. Or bring your friends there and make new memories. Happy ones. 

3-steps. Sounds easy? Perhaps. But one thing experience told me, it takes an awful lot of will power to be able to do this. I’ve experimented on my friends. Some were successful, some weren’t. Some are still trying. It takes time. And your persistence to move forward in your life. 

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